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Poems - audible to heart
| | audible to heartby deepali
music to parched earth
pitter-patter of the rain
- audience awaits
music to his ears
the tip toe of her sandals
- waiting audience
music to my ears
sound of mom’s knitting needles
- still audible
~deepali
[A tree falling in a forest unobserved makes a sound. The forest may not recognize this as a sound because a forest is many life forms interacting, not organized by some central principle or consciousness. They just do what they do. In the same way, playing Beethoven's Ninth to a bowl of yeast will not elicit a response. The insensate remain unobservant, much like the universe itself.]
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| "audible to heart" | Login/Create an Account | 40 |
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| The comments are owned by the poster. We aren't responsible for their content. |
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Re: audible to heart
(Score: 1 )
by Ozymandias on Wednesday, June 13, 2012 (06:25:04) |
Yes, I remember this from the forums - I see you've added a third stanza which IMHO improves it even more. A fine piece!
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Re: audible to heart
(Score: 1 )
by deepali on Wednesday, June 13, 2012 (08:19:47) |
yes, added the third stanza for my mom. She used to stay awake, late night, knitting, while my brother and i would study. In that quiet atmosphere, knitting needles held by her beautiful hands, made a very soft swishing sound, was sheer music to my ears, and the ball of wool rolling at her feet looked like a kitten.
Was unsure about posting this but you and anna, really helped me, at the forum.
Thanks so much, dear Rory!
fond regards,
D.
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Re: audible to heart
(Score: 1 )
by KateBurnell on Wednesday, June 13, 2012 (08:32:54) |
Well said. A fine pull of the heart.
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Re: audible to heart
(Score: 1 )
by deepali on Wednesday, June 13, 2012 (08:40:21) |
Many thanks for the read and the lovely comment, dear Kate!
warm wishes,
D.
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Re: audible to heart
(Score: 1 )
by alana on Wednesday, June 13, 2012 (10:38:23) |
so much of music, audio audible
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Re: audible to heart
(Score: 1 )
by deepali on Wednesday, June 13, 2012 (23:10:23) |
Thanks a ton, dearest alana!
the audible power is directly proportional to our proximity..
love and best wishes,
D.
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Re: audible to heart
(Score: 1 )
by Glen on Wednesday, June 13, 2012 (10:47:28) |
very nice poem ,funny all mothers loved knitting
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Re: audible to heart
(Score: 1 )
by deepali on Wednesday, June 13, 2012 (23:18:07) |
so true, all mothers knit love with the yarn and wrap their angels in it, as a protection shield.
Thanks so much for the appreciation.
warm wishes,
D
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Re: audible to heart
(Score: 1 )
by wordsmithwannabe on Wednesday, June 13, 2012 (12:41:58) |
lyrical and lovely, a wonderful set of ku's, D. well done!
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Re: audible to heart
(Score: 1 )
by deepali on Wednesday, June 13, 2012 (23:19:52) |
Thanks a lot, dear Chris!
means a lot, coming from you.
warmest wishes,
D.
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Re: audible to heart
(Score: 1 )
by deepali on Thursday, June 14, 2012 (02:37:17) |
Dear anonymous rater, thanks for the low rating!!
love,
D.
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Re: audible to heart
(Score: 1 )
by FuchsiaFestival! on Thursday, June 14, 2012 (09:57:25) |
I believe a low rater is like an invisible person. When a person's invisible, they don't really exist, so they can't rate after all. I like to think of a low rating as the action of a "ghost person" happened by chance: to sum this up, the low rater is absent, unimportant.
As for the piece itself, much respect! I enjoyed the sentimentality of it, very smooth in tone and depth. Good work!
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Re: audible to heart
(Score: 1 )
by deepali on Thursday, June 14, 2012 (10:04:56) |
Thanks oceans, my sweet, wise friend!
So happy, you liked it. This is what matters to me.
lots of love,
ali.
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Re: audible to heart
(Score: 1 )
by omegapaf on Friday, June 15, 2012 (02:23:33) |
dear anonymous low rater...go f**k yourself. i was going to say something sarcastic to the low rater, but i think that says it all. appologies for the language ali - paul and the high rated hound.
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Re: audible to heart
(Score: 1 )
by mamta on Friday, June 15, 2012 (23:50:14) |
a rating of 8 is not a low rate deepali. if i were to rate this i would give it only an 8. and personally i got sick of getting 9s and 10s for my poems that i decided to remove it from the ratings. someone like you should not be complaining for a rate of 7 and above. low rates are 1,2,3. i am rating it with an 8 now. and i don't think i have low rated your poem.
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Re: audible to heart
(Score: 1 )
by deepali on Saturday, June 16, 2012 (01:03:56) |
Thanks Mamta!
love,
D.
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Re: audible to heart
(Score: 1 )
by elixandor on Sunday, June 17, 2012 (00:37:10) |
A +1 on Mamta's reply. I totally agree!
As for the poem, I jst love the piece! Surreal..cant be rated(low) 
A 10 and you know you deserve more.
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Re: audible to heart
(Score: 1 )
by deepali on Sunday, June 17, 2012 (06:30:05) |
Thanks a lot, Sasha!
love,
D.
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Re: audible to heart
(Score: 1 )
by MoZark on Thursday, June 14, 2012 (08:07:01) |
I found this sad, remembering my own Mom. Well conceived. Have a grand tomorrow…Jack
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Re: audible to heart
(Score: 1 )
by deepali on Thursday, June 14, 2012 (09:53:45) |
Thanks a lot, Jack!
Mom, this word has a magic, works like a time machine..
warm wishes,
D.
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Re: audible to heart
(Score: 1 )
by zoe_in_a_bubble on Thursday, June 14, 2012 (11:00:50) |
I liked these perceptions of what can be near and dear. I imagined the rain as a soft applause.
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Re: audible to heart
(Score: 1 )
by deepali on Thursday, June 14, 2012 (11:05:57) |
That's an awesome comment!
you just entered my mind...
Thanks and tons of love,
D.
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Re: audible to heart
(Score: 1 )
by WordLover on Thursday, June 14, 2012 (21:51:14) |
Just a really lovely set of senryu's - the 3rd really tugged at my heartstrings. Great job.
Sandy
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Re: audible to heart
(Score: 1 )
by deepali on Friday, June 15, 2012 (06:24:37) |
Thanks a lot, Sandy!
love,
D.
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Re: audible to heart
(Score: 1 )
by fogglethorpe on Friday, June 15, 2012 (03:35:03) |
A very fine set of senryu. The middle one is my favorite.
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Re: audible to heart
(Score: 1 )
by deepali on Friday, June 15, 2012 (06:26:28) |
Feels great to be appreciated by you.
Thanks!
warm wishes,
D.
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Re: audible to heart
(Score: 1 )
by liarbird on Wednesday, June 20, 2012 (01:19:23) |
G'day deepali...
So few words but wonderful sentiments that will always live with you.
Thank you deepali
Lindsay
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Re: audible to heart
(Score: 1 )
by deepali on Wednesday, June 20, 2012 (08:27:21) |
G'day Lindsay
Many thanks for your beautiful comment.
warm wishes,
D.
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Re: audible to heart
(Score: 1 )
by Pujakins on Wednesday, June 27, 2012 (21:05:47) |
Wonderful poem! I really liked this one a lot. It was clever and original and enjoyable too. What more can I say. Ten tens and hearts to you! Thanks for your sweet sharing, Love, Tasha
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Re: audible to heart
(Score: 1 )
by deepali on Sunday, July 01, 2012 (12:38:06) |
That's really sweet of you.
You have a big heart, dearest Tasha!
Thanks so much!!
fond regards,
D.
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Re: audible to heart
(Score: 1 )
by doris on Saturday, December 01, 2012 (09:43:19) |
The statement at the end is quite powerful and illuminates the poem beautifully. You have left me thinking and that is a gift to me.
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Re: audible to heart
(Score: 1 )
by deepali on Sunday, December 02, 2012 (03:06:11) |
Many thanks, Doris!
I completely agree with you..it's the highlight.
Sometimes, a thought can create a sound too!
warm wishes,
D.
 Added on: 13-Jun-2012 | Hits: 534 |
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01: dav.smith
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