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Poems - The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka)

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The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka)

by WordLover

negativity
a sickly-sweet toxin, a
poisonous perfume
smothers optimism and
deftly douses passions’ flame





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Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
by Craigd741 on Sunday, March 14, 2010 (12:57:11)
You've conveyed a negative thing so beautifully, which can be a hard thing to do. I love the tonka structure. Great write Sandy!

| Parent
    Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
    by WordLover on Sunday, March 14, 2010 (13:09:55)
    Thanks Craig, one of my real pet peeves I guess - so I tried to find just the right words to say how destructive being around negative people can be. Appreciate your kind words, as always my friend.

    Sandy

    | Parent

Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
by raw on Sunday, March 14, 2010 (13:08:32)
Very nice choice of words to explain negativity. Nice tanka form.

| Parent
    Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
    by WordLover on Sunday, March 14, 2010 (13:11:17)
    Thank you soooo much raw - very much appreciate your taking the time to read my work! I love to do tankas, they are short, but you can say alot in a few words and make a good point. Negativity is one of my pet peeves I guess - such a downer for everyone. Thank you again, my friend!

    Sandy

    | Parent

Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
by Jayelle on Sunday, March 14, 2010 (14:01:42)
Perfectly & succinctly stated! I ought to print this & hang it up at work!!! Good job here. J.

| Parent
    Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
    by WordLover on Sunday, March 14, 2010 (18:04:47)
    Thanks J! Very much appreciated, I am such a fan of your work. I guess this is one of my own pet peeves, and I starting thinking about how this type of person can have such an adverse effect on the lives of others. And, yes, there are quite a few co-workers that fit this bill! lol Thanks again!!

    Sandy

    | Parent

Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
by wordsmithwannabe on Sunday, March 14, 2010 (15:24:43)
beautifully done Sandy, makes me wanna try a tanka!! and I agree with Joan, I'm going to print this off and hang it in huge letters on the wall of my office!!! lovely words from an even lovelier WordLover Wink Wink Wink

chris

| Parent
    Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
    by WordLover on Sunday, March 14, 2010 (18:06:51)
    awwww thank you my friend! You should definitely try a tanka. They are cool because you get two extra lines that you don't get with a regular haiku - it's 5/7/5/7/7 syllable count. I love being able to say something strong in a few words! And as always, hearing from you makes my day!!

    Sandy

    | Parent

Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
by maryanns on Sunday, March 14, 2010 (18:10:10)
Ummmm, savoring your lesson, Sandy.
'Tis so true... your poem brings caution
into focus perfectly.
Best wishes, Mary Ann

| Parent
    Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
    by WordLover on Sunday, March 14, 2010 (18:52:44)
    Yeah, I must have been having one of those "moments" where I just thought, "man, I am sooooo sick of of the whining - just GET OVER IT"!! It's always so good to hear from you, my friend. Thanks again.

    Sandy

    | Parent

Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
by orangetulips12 on Sunday, March 14, 2010 (19:35:46)
wordlover, i would believe if you bottled it, it would sell... people seem to be happy when they are knocken people down than building them up.... nicely written. Karen

| Parent
    Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
    by WordLover on Sunday, March 14, 2010 (20:16:43)
    Thank you so much Karen, yes, I believe you're right - sad as that is to think about! There just seems to be so much negativity around these days - so many have so much and still aren't satisfied! Thanks for stopping by to read and review my work, much appreciated. Nice to meet you!

    Sandy

    | Parent

Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
by Liquid_Chaos on Sunday, March 14, 2010 (20:45:10)
"A sickly-sweet toxin" awesome line right there and, of course, the rest of the poem is awesome too! Wink

Great job!

Take care, L_C

| Parent
    Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
    by WordLover on Sunday, March 14, 2010 (21:06:12)
    Thank you, my friend! Yep, one of my pet peeves I guess - thought I'd put into words how all that whining gets to me sometimes! lol - good to hear from you!

    Take care/Sandy

    | Parent

Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
by Keeperofhope on Monday, March 15, 2010 (00:58:51)
Nice little write you have here thanks for sharing
yours truly
Jess

| Parent
    Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
    by WordLover on Monday, March 15, 2010 (07:10:32)
    Hi Jess - thanks for reading! I love this form of poetry - it's short and sweet and, hopefully, gets the feeling out that I'm trying to convey! As always, I appreciate your stopping by and commenting my friend.

    Sandy

    | Parent

Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
by scapegoatmilk on Monday, March 15, 2010 (03:52:52)
You have a definite grasp on the language, but the message is a bit shallow. Negativity opposes optimism? You seem to have stated a fact with pretty words. Shouldn't a poem do more than that?

| Parent
    Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
    by WordLover on Monday, March 15, 2010 (07:09:17)
    A tanka, as with any type of haiku, is short and strong. point. You have only only 17 syllables to make your point. My point was that negativity snuffs out a passion for living life to the fullest. It could be delved into much deeper, of course, using perhaps another form of poetry. By writing in tanka form I was simply stating my opinion of what negative thoughts are to me. Thanks for your comments.

    Sandy

    | Parent

Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
by Ilan on Monday, March 15, 2010 (08:59:28)
Very descriptive adjectival vvvvvery good
which means I liked it. The Tonks is
direct, precise sends the message no
beating around the bush given few
syllables, well written and a strong
message. Ilan

| Parent
    Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
    by WordLover on Monday, March 15, 2010 (09:06:06)
    llan, thank you so very much my friend! Glad you enjoyed!

    Sandy

    | Parent
      Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
      by Ilan on Monday, March 15, 2010 (09:26:24)
      Sandy it's a pleasure, this is an
      important piece you've written,
      heck put on the evening news and
      see the negativity, or what we call
      in Australia the tall poppy syndrome,
      cutting down the successful people
      because of jealousy.

      Your poem is of high relevance.

      Goodnight from Sydney, Ilan

      | Parent
        Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
        by WordLover on Monday, March 15, 2010 (10:05:48)
        awww, llan, I can't thank you enough for your sweet words!

        Sandy

        | Parent

Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
by Disfrazada on Monday, March 15, 2010 (11:09:47)
Great tanka Sandy... regardless of what the goat above says Rolling Eyes

Take care my friend......

DiSfRaZada

| Parent
    Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
    by WordLover on Monday, March 15, 2010 (13:21:38)
    You are awesome Dr. D!!! Smile

    | Parent
    Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
    by Ilan on Monday, March 15, 2010 (16:17:53)
    The anti poet strikes for to call another poets
    poem shallow as the goat does is plain
    rude.

    Not to detract from Sandys poem here
    may I draw attention to my poem
    the anti poet for when I read the goats
    comments above it hurt,

    Sandy your poem on optimism will live
    forever, I'll read it to my daughter too

    ilan

    | Parent
    Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
    by StarDust on Tuesday, March 16, 2010 (12:07:04)
    Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy Shocked Shocked Shocked Shocked Shocked Shocked Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy Very Happy

    | Parent

Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
by danielouis on Monday, March 15, 2010 (14:38:41)
no words could be realer..danny..thanks for posting...

| Parent
    Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
    by WordLover on Monday, March 15, 2010 (15:04:56)
    Thank you my friend danny - haven't seen much of you on GP, hope you're okay?

    Sandy

    | Parent

Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
by WHMechem on Monday, March 15, 2010 (14:42:25)
Sandy,
An astute treatment of a very challenging topic. Bravo!
Will

| Parent
    Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
    by WordLover on Monday, March 15, 2010 (15:06:02)
    Thanks Will!! I try my best to avoid those types of folks as much as possible - they have a way of bringing everyone around them down. Thanks for stopping by, much appreciated as always.

    Sandy

    | Parent

Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
by cathy.robinson on Monday, March 15, 2010 (15:09:21)
Love it! i wrote something similar. ..ill let you know when i post it.

| Parent
    Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
    by WordLover on Monday, March 15, 2010 (19:42:38)
    oh please do cathy - I really appreciate your taking the time to read my work. It's always wonderful to receive positive feedback - so encouraging!

    Take care/Sandy

    | Parent

Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
by StarDust on Tuesday, March 16, 2010 (12:09:17)
Sandy this is awesome!!!

A very realistic point shown to all in a very clever way... GREAT JOB my friend!!!

| Parent
    Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
    by WordLover on Tuesday, March 16, 2010 (12:27:06)
    Thanks sweetie - negative folks can really get my "goat" sometimes! Smile

    | Parent

Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
by thewholesoul on Thursday, March 18, 2010 (13:00:55)
loved it - word choice was perfect. i just simply leave the presence of negative people as they bring me down, however i tend to come across few people like that.

be well
conor

| Parent
    Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
    by WordLover on Thursday, March 18, 2010 (17:08:59)
    thank you conor, your words are very much appreciated. Yes, I'm the same way, I try my best to stay away from them as much as possible. They are toxic.

    Thanks, as always, my friend.

    Sandy

    | Parent

Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
by Melly on Sunday, March 21, 2010 (14:27:46)
Sandy , this is wonderfully structured.. like you I don't like negativity and find that it crushes spirit in an already depressed society . Love the way you brought this one to life and made it yours as only you can do.. Hugs Melly

| Parent
    Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
    by WordLover on Tuesday, March 23, 2010 (08:03:01)
    awww Melly, so great to hear from you my friend. I thank you for your very kind comments. I felt strongly about this one - negativity is so pointless and draining and brings everyone around us down with them. Thank you again, and take good care.

    Sandy

    | Parent

Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
by Ozymandias on Saturday, March 27, 2010 (02:20:19)
There's more to this than negativity opposing optimism. It goes deeper than that and is expressed concisely and to the point. Well done.

| Parent
    Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
    by WordLover on Saturday, March 27, 2010 (06:58:26)
    Thanks so much Ozzy - means a lot coming from you. That's exactly what I was trying to get across - appreciate the feedback so much.

    Sandy

    | Parent

Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
by Tamara on Tuesday, April 27, 2010 (17:22:45)
I give this poem a "10." This is so true, and you've stated it all in only a few words.

Great job!

Best,

Tamara

| Parent
    Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
    by WordLover on Wednesday, April 28, 2010 (06:57:03)
    Oh Tamara, thanks so much! A real pet peeve of mine put to words. What a wonderful world it could be if we could rid it of negative thoughts! I appreciate your kind words my friend.

    Sandy

    | Parent

Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
by butterflyzrfree on Saturday, May 15, 2010 (08:19:05)
A fascinating look at a concept that I hadnt really thought about. Bravo!

| Parent
    Re: The Glass Half-Empty (a tanka) (Score: 1 )
    by WordLover on Saturday, May 15, 2010 (13:47:33)
    You know I really look at negative people as poisonous - I will do everything I can to avoid them as much as possible, so they won't pull me down with them. So glad you enjoyed, Gail, and thanks so much.

    Sandy

    | Parent


[ WordLover's profile | Commenting Members (21) | | ]

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