Too many Chefs in the Kitchen

"Too many Chefs in the Kitchen" | Login/Create an Account | 4

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b-like what you are trying to do with this cute poem-If i was editing I would make a couple suggestions-In the third to last stanza-I would like to see the "upon" changed to "based on your taste" smoothes the line out a bit and gets rid of poetic language. In the last stanza I have the same issue and would change the line “this I do stress” to something less formal like “please let me stress” or “I’d like to stress”. Keeps the same rhythms but removes the stiffness from the line. Anyway my opinion only- it’s a fun little poem-Good write

Re: Too many Chefs in the Kitchen (Score: 1 ) by browneyesblue on Wednesday, April 20, 2011 (09:10:10)

thanks so much. I value constructive comments! I'll explain: I used "upon" because it gave me the extra syllable I needed in order to keep the 5-syllable rythem for that specific line within the stanza; to use "on" would have thrown the rythem off. I chose "this I do stress" because I didn't want to be so direct in placing blame; rather, I just wanted to make a statement. Saying "please" or "i'd like to" (in my opinion) would make it a tad more personal than I intended. Thanks so much for taking the time to read my poem and give me your thoughts. I'm glad you enjoyed it.


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Wow. this is just so true. Like I've always said, ''A kitchen, is never big enough for two people. It's a good indicator how well a marriage is, by the amount of arguing that takes place. We have a lot of temperamental chiefs over here in the UK. Gordon Ramsey, a fine example. A nice piece of work. I enjoyed it. A 10 and a heart. Very well done. Pete. LOL .

Re: Too many Chefs in the Kitchen (Score: 1 ) by browneyesblue on Saturday, October 01, 2011 (17:14:11)

Thanks, Pete. Not one of my best writes, but I sure had fun writing it.


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