Analysis of H.O.W.
Everyone has a plan till life punches you in the jaw.
Come on y'all.
How many of us can say being wasted is still fun?
Not one.
When you boil it down we've beaten ourselves to the ground.
Almost six feet under.
But our spark cannot be torn asunder.
You've been where I've been.
Heard what I've heard.
Seen what I've seen.
Saw what I saw
Done did what I did.
What the Motherf**k?
A second ago I was a teenage kid.
From weed to cocaine to acid.
Twenty-nine years I
incessantly, obsessively, excessively I continued dig.
Now my second rehab in two months.
A Total of five in my lifetime.
I must have been out of my mind to O.D. on multiple occasions.
I'm alive. Facts. Strange & Amazing.
Still I kept going back to that dog food.
My heart screamed out in fury "Keep that s**t!".
But I was mentally, spiritually, & physically sick.
In the warm fuzzy, furry, flurry of synthetic warmth with blurry vision
I welcomed my old friend Oblivion.
Lost Transmission. Dark Intermission.
On another mission to hold Death's hand.
Over & Over & Over.
Again & Again & Again.
In my Jungian Shadow for so long.
Dawn after sleepless dawn.
For what seemed to me to be an eternity.
An answer to a seemingly simple question is what I seek...
...How?
How do I break free?
From insanity?
An insanity I bleed for in order to squeeze out a few drops of a simulacrum of comfort.
At a time when a synthesized simulation to hide the degradation of my life felt good enough.
Again I ask how?
And I ask further...
...What?
What is normality?
Finally, I'm starting to see.
However it's still foreign to me.
I now know who I am.
I'm not playing or messing.
It's a God-given blessing.
Self-belief, self-respect, self-love were once out of reach, painfully.
There was a time not long ago when any
endeavor for good or ill would feel like acts of futility.
I prayed that those whom preyed upon
me would pay a price equal to or greater than the prices they charged me.
I have a confession...
... I made my choices.
My faults lie within me.
There's no other possible way it can ever be.
Wouldn't be lovely if I could get back the cash half of the costs?
A third question...
...What have I lost?
Jobs, possessions,
interpersonal connections,
not being able to look
at my own reflection,
light & love.
Chests full of love.
What have I lost?
All of the above.
I'm getting it all back.
How ya like me now jack?
I'm pushing myself, more than a shove.
In the past sobriety & recovery didn't last.
Just as I broke through the surface to breathe,
she seductively tugged on my sleeve.
She's a super-sexy succubus.
Who can and will f**k every last one of us.
Grinding our flesh and bones to dust.
How ya like her now?
The realization took quite a while.
That bitch is straight trash.
I say it with a smile.
I implore you all to recall my first question
which I shall now answer with an acronym...
... H.O.W.
Scheme | axbb xcc xxxad xdxxx exfg xhx bbb xcxxxh xI hhxx icxhhhxgg hhhxh bxhh x bJ ffxbkk Jkllk xxxexx imxm bxI |
---|---|
Poetic Form | |
Metre | 1010111101001 11 11011111010111 11 11111110001101 11110 11011011010 11111 1111 1111 1111 11111 1011 0100111011 11101110 10111 01000100010010101 111000011 01011011 11111111111100010 10111010 1111011111 11110101111 1111001000010001 0011010101010111010 1101110100 10101010 1010101111 101010 010101 0111111 110101 111111110100 1101010010101111 1 11111 10100 10100111010111011101110 10110100101100101111101 01111 01110 1 11100 10011011 10111011 111111 1110110 1011010 1011011101111100 11011101110 0101111111110100 11111101 111011011101010111 110010 11110 111011 1110100111101 1011011111011101 0110 1111 1010 0100010 1101011 111010 11 1111 1111 11001 110111 111111 11011101 0010100010101 1111101011 101001111 1010101 1101111001111 101010111 11101 010101101 11111 111101 10111111110 11111011100 1 |
Closest metre | Iambic tetrameter |
Characters | 3,256 |
Words | 647 |
Sentences | 87 |
Stanzas | 20 |
Stanza Lengths | 4, 3, 5, 5, 4, 3, 3, 6, 2, 4, 9, 5, 4, 1, 2, 6, 5, 6, 4, 3 |
Lines Amount | 84 |
Letters per line (avg) | 26 |
Words per line (avg) | 6 |
Letters per stanza (avg) | 108 |
Words per stanza (avg) | 27 |
About this poem
I wrote this while in a rehabilitation center for use-disorder(substance abuse). Honestly Openness Willingness The rest speaks for itself.
Font size:
Written on October 25, 2023
Submitted by CourageousLittleKingBelovedByGod on December 05, 2023
- 3:19 min read
- 0 Views
Citation
Use the citation below to add this poem analysis to your bibliography:
Style:MLAChicagoAPA
"H.O.W." Poetry.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 29 May 2024. <https://www.poetry.com/poem-analysis/177662/h.o.w.>.
Discuss this Ryan David Virgillo poem analysis with the community:
Report Comment
We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.
If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly.
Attachment
You need to be logged in to favorite.
Log In