Analysis of 2:46 am

I'm awake...
Went to bed early, but didn't sleep
Got up went to the kitchen and drank red wine
Back to bed only thinking of ways to pass the time

When I keep my mind and hands occupied I'm good
When I talk to people or share a joke and laugh I'm good
When it's just me in a quiet room, the memories surround me, tears flow, and I'm not good anymore

So many images of me and that man play a slide show in my head
I remember things about him I want to touch:
His widow's peak
That tiny mole on the left side of his neck
His slender tapered fingers...

When do these withdrawal symptoms end having run their course leaving me clean from this inticing drug I so willingly indulged in...
So willingly became addicted to...