Analysis of Shutting down

Lost in this life trying to find my way,
im just trying to publish this book.
On my own no guidance and all the support who said they will be there,don't y'all show up when I get better no support,so don't come while I'm up.
Alone and lost my life is confused even my projects are a waste,all those quote cards that i made,the time and energy I want to help others who needs a hand,but god I need a lending hand and a friend.
I'm just going  with the flow i guess that's how the universe works.  
Waking each day same things over and over no life out side these walls.
 I feel im living inside them, heck I'm beginning to talk to them.
To much reflection I need to brake all the connections
In my cave I shall be ,fake people all over I don't want my time wasted.
Not one insight on my book that I can see...
I'm tring to reach out i shout but no one is about to help me out.
I thought I had my heart set but its a bust,im done with the struggles im hitting the road and not looking back.
No one come find me, leave me be please, i can't keep on being this isolated.
 I'm fading in my own hopes I don't got room to cope.
Mama I'm coming soon hold the doors...