Analysis of My dead garden



A silent rain drop forms in the corner of my eye,  
Stilly watering the dead garden that I’ve created around me.  

Drip,  
Drip,
Dro…

The crunchy sticks of dried up dreams,
mixed with the dead flowers of hopes long gone,
Or maybe ones that never began to bloom.
That feeling of hopelessness,
like a whale on the shore,
Gasping for air.
never knowing which breath is its last.
Then mustering up the courage for one more inhale.
then exhale.

Inhale,
Exhale.

How much longer can I sustain this for?  

I’m struggling for a breath in a world bursting with oxygen.
hanging on to a rope that seems to be tied to nothing.
Time comes back to me,
crashing in like a wave unwelcomed,
smiling as it gets swept up by the ocean,
as a tease
- it gets to go home, but I don’t.
I’m here to stay in my garden.
Not alone, but lonely.
I’m surrounded by hundreds of vast gardens,
but theirs are lush, green, and colorful.
Alive.
mine is gray, dark, and depleted.
Dead.

Why can’t my garden be colorful too?

As the silent rain drop falls,
I pray that this tear brings my dead sticks to life,
And makes them blossom too.   
Adding color to the desolate,
Until my gray turns blue,
Then purple,
Then red.
Orange,
Then Yellow.
The sun will come up,
And dry my silent tear.
I’ll dance in my garden.
Not alone,
Not lonely.

This tear wasn’t the one,
My garden remains lifeless,
But I can see the drop glisten on the withered flowers.
Maybe it’s a sign of what's to come -
Or maybe it’s another dream,
Bound to become a dried out stick.
Living the rest of its life,
In my dead garden.


Scheme xa BBc xxxdcceff ff c gxaxgxegaxhxxi j xkjxjhixxxcgxa gdxxxxkg
Poetic Form
Metre 0101110010111 1100011011010011 1 1 1 01011111 1101101111 11011100111 1101100 101101 1011 101011111 1100101011101 101 01 01 1110110111 1100101001101100 10110111111110 11111 100101010 10111111010 101 11111111 11110110 101110 10101101110 111110100 01 11110010 1 1111011001 1010111 11111111111 011101 101010100 011111 110 11 10 110 01111 011101 110110 101 110 11101 1100110 11110110101010 101011111 11010101 11010111 1001111 01110
Closest metre Iambic trimeter
Characters 1,611
Words 354
Sentences 27
Stanzas 9
Stanza Lengths 2, 3, 9, 2, 1, 14, 1, 14, 8
Lines Amount 54
Letters per line (avg) 22
Words per line (avg) 5
Letters per stanza (avg) 131
Words per stanza (avg) 33

About this poem

Just some reflections from a rough year of my life. It may seem sad, but to me it’s hopeful. There’s always hope.

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Submitted by LillianP on April 27, 2024

1:46 min read
5

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