Santa Goes Bankrupt
Santa's not coming on the 25th, I promise you that,
He's much too busy eating snacks,
Well, how do you think he got so fat,
He can't fit through the chimney, until skinny, he's dieting and won't be back;
So make no noise little girls and boys,
Until Santa lose some weight, when you awake there shall be no toys,
The reindeers tried, but Santa got too big for them to fly,
Donner has arthritis, comet and cupid have weak bones,
You know Rudolph is strong and smart but can't do it alone,
So maybe next year, he'll give you holiday cheer,
But he's still eating Thanksgiving dinner all while drinking a beer,
Mrs Clause ain't no better, she's drinking and won't knit the elves a Christmas Sweater,
So Prancer and Dancer decided to wear red & green leather,
Vixen and Blixten are boycotting Christmas altogether,
So they all vacated the North Pole for blue skies and warm weather,
The truth is; Santa's not on a diet & has not gained weight,
He still fat, and loves cookies and snacks,
He's been giving and giving your children for years, but this year, we all need to give back,
Santa has gone bankrupt and his Toy money is gone,
He tried to get a loan, Ms Clause earrings he even tried to pawn,
For weeks the Reindeers had no food to eat,
Some reluctantly decided to leave and started foraging,
With no heat for weeks, the elves left the North Pole,
Traded the winter cold, and met up with Homer,
in Springfield and got drinks at Moe's,
Don't hate the messenger, this is how the story goes,
So there will be no more Christmas trees, Carolers, Presents or Gifts,
This years Christmas is undergoing A major metamorphosis,
Every year Santa supplies your kids with what they want and wish,
Now Santa's pockets is dry and can use a forklift,
So let them cry let them ask why let them beg and plead,
Santa said hell no to spoiled milk and hard chocolate chip cookies,
Y'all want gifts, oh please, so much have been given with ease,
Do y'all ever stop to ask Saint Nick is there anything that he needs.
About this poem
This is a snippet of a potential play turned poetry. It's just my Warped, Unorthodox, Humorous take on Christmas. I hope everyone who Celebrates have an extraordinary holiday as well as those who don't.
Font size:
Translation
Find a translation for this poem in other languages:
Select another language:
- - Select -
- 简体中文 (Chinese - Simplified)
- 繁體中文 (Chinese - Traditional)
- Español (Spanish)
- Esperanto (Esperanto)
- 日本語 (Japanese)
- Português (Portuguese)
- Deutsch (German)
- العربية (Arabic)
- Français (French)
- Русский (Russian)
- ಕನ್ನಡ (Kannada)
- 한국어 (Korean)
- עברית (Hebrew)
- Gaeilge (Irish)
- Українська (Ukrainian)
- اردو (Urdu)
- Magyar (Hungarian)
- मानक हिन्दी (Hindi)
- Indonesia (Indonesian)
- Italiano (Italian)
- தமிழ் (Tamil)
- Türkçe (Turkish)
- తెలుగు (Telugu)
- ภาษาไทย (Thai)
- Tiếng Việt (Vietnamese)
- Čeština (Czech)
- Polski (Polish)
- Bahasa Indonesia (Indonesian)
- Românește (Romanian)
- Nederlands (Dutch)
- Ελληνικά (Greek)
- Latinum (Latin)
- Svenska (Swedish)
- Dansk (Danish)
- Suomi (Finnish)
- فارسی (Persian)
- ייִדיש (Yiddish)
- հայերեն (Armenian)
- Norsk (Norwegian)
- English (English)
Citation
Use the citation below to add this poem to your bibliography:
Style:MLAChicagoAPA
"Santa Goes Bankrupt" Poetry.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 8 Jun 2024. <https://www.poetry.com/poem/176407/santa-goes-bankrupt>.
Discuss the poem Santa Goes Bankrupt with the community...
Report Comment
We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.
If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly.
Attachment
You need to be logged in to favorite.
Log In